bittergrapes is still blanked out and Tumblr support hasn’t gotten back to me about getting it unlocked. I have all of my posts saved on my computer, and some time, when I don’t have a million other things to do (like research, prepping manuscripts, freelancing for nonprofits, living, etc), I will probably move them over to cameronsidhe.blogspot.com so that they can be archived.
I’m not very enamored with Tumblr anymore. Part of it is my own fault: I allowed RL and internet friends to mingle, and so what I do in real life was immediately transferring over to my internet presence, when in reality I like more privacy and seclusion than that. Some of my followers (and followees) were also leaving me cryptic messages like “has anyone ever written anything about you?” or people repeatedly sending me messages about a certain thing or act.
It’s tiring, having all of that interaction. It’s part of the reason that my mania got so bad, because people were indulging me or pushing me toward something, and I went all the way over the edge. I was losing agency over my own life because so many people were doing things for/about me without my knowledge or consent. And it disappoints me, because many of the folks who were doing that were good friends and I trusted them a great deal.
So, this is sort of my resignation from Tumblr. I don’t enjoy being on this website anymore. Getting so much attention, both good and bad, was way too much for me. Getting into exhausting arguments was way too much for me. Having to always defend my own life and identity against strangers who I will never meet - no thanks.
I might pop in every once in a while, but for now, I would like to focus on my mental health, my close relationships, and my career goals. Contact information is as follows:
So long and thanks for all the fish.